For the past few weeks, we’ve been working through Paul’s letter to the Galatians and I for one am pleased with our progress. Paul was the original Perry Mason and I’ve always enjoyed the whodunit-iveness of his summations. However, I’m going to put Galatians on the back burner for a week to address a community-wide problem that I see developing. That being an erosion of domestic harmony amongst our married parishioners.
As the kids say, #IwanttoStrangletheGobshite is trending in my confessionals this week. Sure lookit, I understand the challenge of being locked inside with the one whom the Lord anointed thou to be tethered to for mortal eternity. And sure, the last two months have indeed been a mortal eternity.
So to save time, yours and mine, I’m going to give all of you a blanket lecture now so I don’t have to hear about it in the confessional this Friday. I understand that turning the other cheek and squashing down murderous inclinations inside ourselves is more a Lutheran quality which we have not mastered. But the explosions of fierce marital discord are beginning to be heard down the lane. You’re scaring the sheep, folks. This long winter has been very difficult and I’ve no reason to expect marital bliss from you. Let’s just try for some harmony. And I don’t mean moaning on in unison. Have a care for your partner who is frayed about the edges from being cooped up with you as well. A little self-awareness is in order. The Bible is chock-a-block with the nuggets of introspection. Please take note:
“A quarrelsome wife is as annoying as constant dripping on a rainy day. Stopping her complaints is like trying to stop the wind or trying to hold something with greased hands.” – Proverbs 27:15-16
“It is better to live alone in the desert than with a crabby, complaining wife.” – Proverbs 21:19
Ladies, please. We know he has never been as scruffy as his now. We know he smells like a wet dog after a run through surf at low tide. Frankly, that smell has always been there. You’re just more attuned to after 6 weeks of him rotating through his 3 pair of suffering kacks. The point is please stop eating the face off yer man because you’ve had to share a cell with him. If inmates at Mountjoy can learn to share a toilet, you can as well.
And if you believe I’m singling out the wives, I’ll say this. Don’t push your luck, lads.
“No one whose testicles are crushed or whose penis is cut off shall be admitted to the assembly of the LORD.” – Deuteronomy 23:1
Now 5 Hail Mary’s to you if any of this resonated.
Next week, it’s back to our discussion on Galatians where Paul is, ironically enough, arguing against the need for male circumcision.
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